Posted by: Robin~AllThingsHeartandHome | March 18, 2009

Where’s Rambo Mom?

Rambo Mom. I’ve been called that more than once.  The title may have been given to me by one or more of my kid’s teachers, was it Mr. Morecraft or Dr. Kirby?  Not sure, anyhoo, I’ve no idea why someone would label me in that way. That’s my story and I’m sticking to it… Sure, I’m a bit fierce, like most mom’s,  where my children are concerned.  Mess with my kids and really, I nearly loose my religion.  And you in turn may loose your head. Nothing personal.

But Rambo Mom was no where to be found last Tuesday when my daughter Stephie became seriously ill with HELLP Syndrome at 36 weeks pregnant, I found myself in a place I’d never been as a mom.  What a horrifing thing for your child’s health to be failing and there’s nothing you can do. My own mother made this journey with my brother. And some of you reading this have too. I’m so sorry. I can’t even begin to imagine if the outcome had not been a good one for Stephie. How much pain so many parents have had to endure.

vintage-baby-and-momma

It’s in our nature as parents to fix whatever is wrong with our children. . But this situation, well, it was beyond my control. No matter how angry I got, no matter how much I searched for solutions, I couldn’t fix it.  More often than not this Rambo Mom was reduced to a small terrified child crouched in a corner (in my mind )begging God for mercy on my daughter and my granddaughter.  Rambo Mom reduced to a terrified child…that’s not supposed to happen.  I’m the mom. I have to be in control. I have to fix this.  Why did I keep feeling like the child myself?

That first night I was sitting up all alone in the dimly lit waiting room.  It was after midnight and there was a hush over the hospital.  Baby Elliot was in the Neonatal Unit. Steph was on anti-seizure drugs and being monitored carefully. Suddenly over the intercom came this loud beeping and a voice saying  “CODE” —– tower— Room 3— I heard only about half of it, I think I almost blacked out.  After being in the hospital with my mom and a “code” being called on her three times I knew what this meant. Stephie was in one of the “300” rooms.  I jumped up hyperventilating, convinced it was her.  I can’t tell you how traumatic the next 2 or 3 minutes were until I got someone to say the Stephie was okay, it wasn’t her.  After that I will tell you, I wasn’t Rambo Mom, I was nothing more than a terrified, helpless child who ran into her Heavenly Father’s arms.

That surprised me a little…when my child was in peril I became a bit of a child myself. And  the One who made us both took over from there.

Things don’t always turn out like we pray they will, I have a small understanding of this, I lost my little brother to cancer. But last week, when I couldn’t make things right and I was so afraid…I was driven to bring my child and  my granddaughter to Someone who loves them more than I do…Someone who’s bigger than me. Someone even more passionate about Stephie’s well being than Rambo Mom…That Someone is Father God. The One Who holds the Universe also holds my precious girls…tonight I pray again for Him to strengthen Baby Elliot so she can be with her Mom and Dad soon…

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Responses

  1. Wow, to go to God like that is amazing. I am so glad you had Him to comfort you.

    We are praying. Love you

  2. Sometimes we feel so helpless but then we realize we have Someone helping us, always.

  3. This is not something easy to admit for any mom. But I have certainly had moments of feeling like I am way in over my head. I hope in the future, that I too remember who to give it over to. Will say a prayer in the early morning hours in the quiet dark of this new day. Love to you, Rambo mom.

  4. Love this. Makes me think when we Rambo Moms can do no more, Rambo God takes over. Maybe–surely–He’s always there.

  5. Greater is He that is in you than he that is
    in the world. 1 John 4:4

    ….Christ in you, the hope of glory.
    Colossians 1:27b

    A parent has no greater joy than to know his
    children are walking in the Truth.

    Agape,

    dad~

  6. I can so relate to this. My daughter was in an unhealthy relationship and it was so difficult to “let go and let God.” Thankfully, God has removed her from that situation and she is so much happier. We serve a God who has the very hairs of our head numbered and is concerned with that which concerns us. Praise His wonderful name. Blessings, SusanD

  7. Tears, just tears. Love to you all.

  8. Robin, I sat and cried as I read this….your description awakens fears in me….it will be my turn in this place at some point….life can be so hard and we are truly fragile….the mother, the steel magnolia….not in control….not capable of fixing “the thing” that is wrong….with our family
    …with our baby’s ….. I am so thankful….that you could go to GOD for your comfort and peace…what a great witness you are to other’s.
    Have a good day…..Sharon

  9. You are amazing, Robin. I love that you ran into the arms of your Father when you felt helpless.

    And I love the picture of the newest Rambo mom up there. 🙂

  10. I can certainly relate to this, Robin. Even though I haven’t had this specific situation, I have had many others that left me feeling the same. As mother to grown married and unmarried children and 6 grandsons, I found I have had to move into a softer, more backseat role all around. Being a grandmother is the easy part, but relegating Rambo to God and the next generation was harder for me than I thought, surprisingly so. Thankfully, over time it has gotten easier, and the peace that comes with it is amazing. My family is all praising God that He answered and is continuing to answer our prayers for both your family and ours. Sending our love to you all.

  11. Thank you for this. Reminding me that I don’t have to be supermom. I will never have ALL the answers. But that is OK. GOD has all the answers and I just need to turn to Him and he will take care of me. Thank you.

    Give Stephie my love. and Baby Elliot.

  12. I think running to God showed so much more strength than trying to be in control yourself. You were strong enough to do what had to be done… and the only thing to do in that moment was to place those you love in His love.

    You are Rambo Robin to me, girl.

  13. Robin, I am so sorry that I have not been keeping up with you. I am now praying for you and Ellie. I have been there before with things concerning Matthew. I too have been victimized by fear when I lost control of things. I wrote a blog not long ago, Amazing Grace for Lucy, that speaks where I am on this. My final answer though is that I run like you to the arms of Jehovah. One of my favorite sons, In the Presence of Jehovah. He is the Prince of Peace.

  14. I am so touched by your words, Robin.


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